Surprise Surprise, Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart have taken the spotlight off Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes this week in the tabloids. Nicole Kidman’s shoot in V Magazine has made headlines for being a little bit raunchy. Jennifer Aniston got engaged, so NATURALLY the women’s magazines have decided there is a massive wedding feud between her and Angelina Jolie – nothing like a little media speculation over girl on girl rivalry – cos, you know, we all hates each other because we are all competing for the attention of the menz. Unsurprisingly, Diets and weight loss are gaining priority with spring just around the corner, though it certainly feels like it is already here from where I am in Australia.
A – Magazine cover has no mention of Beauty, weight, or appearance.
The tabloids are on a winning streak with four gaining A’s this week. OK, Woman’s Day, New Idea, and Who take out the top spot as they focus on gossip, affairs, weddings, and those pictures of Prince Harry.
B – Magazine cover makes mention of Beauty Routines, and Fashion articles for maximising ones appearance – No shaming or promises of results.
C – Magazine cover prominently mentions Diet/ Health with no hard promises or time frames, Features weight loss stories, Features stories about Beauty Routines which promise results, Features stories on Slimming/ Sexy clothing, Focus on obtaining a particular type of desirable body. Magazine cover focuses on dressing for the male gaze.
Cleo aren’t actually so bad this month – despite their assertion that we all want to be totes sexy for the menz . However, for once, there is no exercise routines or fit into a size smaller or 6 minutes to a flat body or anything like that at all!. In fact, the only focus on body shape or size is the tagline for Big Girl Blogs – meet the new plus size style stars. It’s actually pretty awesome to see Cleo put a cover out there that advertises sexy, sex, and shines a positive light on style blogs for girls bigger than a size 8 – even IF Katy Perry is gracing the cover… I would love to see Cleo continue this focus, and possibly start to feature taglines which have women dressing for themselves rather than to attract the male gaze, but… baby steps!
Grazia – haven’t updated their new photo yet, so I could only give you a small picture of Miranda Kerr in her bikini with the tagline New Special: Secret Diet Diaries – Snoop inside [a?] supermodels fridge. It’s the perfect aspiration cover, without actually selling a diet or exercise routine which promises results, rather there is the underlying assertion that if you eat like Miranda, you too could have her hard-won body. This cover is just in time for spring, reminding its readers that if you haven’t gotten your body beach ready, that it’s not too late to start right this instant – and who better to aspire too in the mainstream opinion?
D – Magazine cover actively promotes diets which promise fast results. Actively promotes Exercise for specific results. Actively assumes worth is determined by Male Gaze. Actively promotes youth for an audience over the age of 21. Actively promotes drastic beauty routines. Slight shaming tendencies.
Famous – apparently Jess Simpson is pregnant again… according to Dr David E. David – who is not Jessica Simpsons Obstetrician, but apparently he is so good at his job he can tell if a woman is pregnant just by looking at them (and is happy to talk to the tabloids about it) – Jess can’t lose the excess weight she gained while pregnant because she is PROBABLY pregnant again… or, she is just busy being a mum and a spokesperson for Weight Watchers. This kind of speculation is harmful, and the article at OK! USA goes further when it asserts that 3 months after giving birth is when women start to regain their pre-pregnancy shape. In fact, there is no hard time limit, and this kind of assertion does nothing more than put pressure on new mums to lose weight they have gained in unhealthy and harmful ways as quickly as possible – especially depending on the details of the birth – episiotomy? Well, you are going to need to wait for that to heal before you can start working out! The general rule is it takes 9 months to gain the weight, so you should allow roughly that time to take it off, however extra fat tends to linger as your body stores it for energy.
Australian Women’s Health –Kate Beckinsale graces AWH this month, and tells us how even though she hates the gym, she scored a rocking bod. The cover also features the tagline Hot Body Fast! Fit in Just 15 Minutes a day alongside the tagline Lose the last 3,5,7kgs: New weight Loss rules that work . This is paired with the contentious Can You Be Healthy At Any Size? Which I won’t touch with a 10 foot pole. And, this is the Better Sex Issue. I have said it before, and I will again. I really wish that AWH would stop giving out time frames – but then, how else are they going to sell! This is a magazine that earns its readership based on covers that sell aspiration.
E – Magazine cover actively shames celebrity/ media personalities’ appearance. Actively promotes unhealthy diets/ unhealthy weight loss/celebrity diet tips. Actively engages in fat/ thin/ age shaming. Shaming dominates the page.
NW – Body Shocks Special!. Bumps, Booty, Bones, & Blunder. There are so many things wrong with the cover, I am not really sure where to start. DO we begin with the same recycled images of LeAnn Rimes and Lindsay Lohan, or should we even begin to dignify Katy Perry’s crack with a remark – let’s face it, it has happened to all of us at the Pool/ Beach. So, I will just ignore the fact that Kim Ks booty is apparently shocking, along with the bones, and bikini blunders being offensive because skinny shaming and bad paparazzi shots are not even worth it. Instead, I will be completely disgusted by the body shocks special being placed over Camila Alves‘ (married to Matthew McConaghy) pregnant bikini clad body. Because, as we all know, once you are pregnant you should barricade yourself in the house lest you offend someone with your glorious life carrying form.
Best Cover- Cleo – For once you didn’t link awesome bodies with sex and men on your cover. I’m proud.
Worst Cover – NW takes it out again with a cover that manages to shame absolutely every body type in one fell swoop. I am kind of impressed.
Honourable Mention –
What did you think? Did I get it wrong? Did I get it right?